Playing Mom

Today, I am playing mom. I have my 2 year old cousin for the day, and although i've babysat him numerous times before, today it's completely up to me. We just got back from going to McDonalds and visiting my mom at work, and on the way home, he fell asleep in his carseat. It was seriously one of the most precious things, looking in my rearview mirror and seeing my little boy peacefully sleeping back there. Sure, I've dealt with a couple fits today, but I have also had a really great time. I know that kids are difficult. I know how stressful and tiring it can be, but I also know that all those small moments of joy overshadow all the stressed out moments. It's days like this that confirm that I want to be a mom. It's also days like this that show me that at this point in my life, I am not ready for it. And that's ok. I'm only 20, I don't need to be a mom right now. I also know that being a single parent is one of the toughest things a person can do. I can't wait until the day that I am married, and I am in the car with my husband and look in the backseat to see our little boy or little girl asleep back there.